Absence of Chivalry

Has chivalry completely left our culture? What would most people say to such a question if it was put to them like so, "Would you say that the general respect that a man gives to a woman as a woman is no more?" I asked a couple people, in no way was this anything near scientific, but I asked what they thought about this aged old tradition of showing a woman the respect we are taught they deserve and if they thought it still takes place. Their overwhelming response was that in their recent experience it has not.

This brings me to the reason that I am writing this piece in the first place. Tonight I picked up my 15 year old daughter from a Friday night hanging out with a couple of her friends. It was her boyfriend and two of their mutual friends. They were hanging out on the other side of town which just so happens to be a couple blocks away from one of their homes. Come time to call it a night, the boys got a ride and because I was coming to pick up my daughter, they all left. So now you have a pretty 15 year old girl standing alone in front of a school building and 9:45 in the evening.

Sure, I was on my way and would be to her soon, but my question is why didn't the guys wait with her until I had arrived? In the days of the past, back when I was a dating teenager, I would have never left a female alone in the dark. No matter if she was my girlfriend, just a friend, or someone else that I just recently met. Regardless of who she was I would have stayed with her to make sure that she got off okay. In my book this is the same as dropping someone off at home and waiting out front for them to actually open their front door and step inside before taking off.

Am I just part of a different era? I think not. I remember being a teenager and hearing my elders say similar things about my generation.  But this "respect" for another person, and for someone of the fairer sex is a learned action. This is something that I was taught over the years I was growing mentally and emotionally. This is something that I was taught about how you treat a lady and how you treat another person in general.

So who is at fault here? Is it this current younger generation or their parents who raised them? Is it the cause and effect of this generation of kids who seem to want everything now - instant gratification? I'm not sure what it is, what the root cause of this is, but it is wrong. People should have much more respect for one another, especially a girl.

You can believe that I had a long discussion with my daughter and explained to her how she should expect to be treated. That she should expect a certain level of respect from her peers and especially from her so-called boyfriend. I want her to understand that she is important and that something important should be kept safe. Even though we live in a very nice suburb and the crime rate here is very low, that does not mean things do not happen here. Anything can happen anywhere and I want her to know that she should always be aware of her surroundings and should always make sure that she does not put herself into a situation like what took place tonight.

I will not go into the safety measure that we all take with our children. That is a list a mile long. I just wanted to point out this lack of respect and lack of people looking out for one another. I was rather disappointed by the actions of the teenagers in my daughters circle of friends and it got me thinking. Hopefully she got the point and I am hoping that maybe somewhere this can maybe open someone else's eyes. Just maybe.